I've been getting melancholy lately. Perhaps, this depression goes a bit with being un-godly sick for a ridiculous amount of time (yes, I'm still fighting it). Things have been happening around the house that make me think homesteading is just not ever going to happen for us. Money slips away and time whips by without much progress towards our life-changing dreams. I feel like we're just bobbing enough to keep our heads above water never getting on the boat that would give us smooth sailing. Fighting against a tide we have no hope of ever besting.
Perhaps, that's what a lot of people feel.
It seems like nightly we've been scouring the house taking down swarms of termites that have been wriggling their way under our near-century old wooden windows, congregating around the nearest lit lightfixture. Dropping their wings wherever they happen to be and chasing each other in frantic mating along walls, in the bathtub and on bed sheets. It's frustrating and gross. Though, other than getting the house tented (which is another set-back and another thing we really can't afford) we just have to deal with it, stalking the windows with the Raid and then unceremoneously vaccuuming up the remains. With the multitude of swarms that visit us practically nightly, it seems we must have a very tasty house.
Still, it makes me wonder what the city rules are on pet anteaters.
Two days ago it was 100.4 degrees outside in the shade. No lie. I can't imagine farming in that kind of weather. Yet, that's all I truly want to be doing; farming. Yesterday, our AC broke. And broke as in part of the mechanism outside fell off and the fan had desintegrated in places.
It only got up to 89 outside but inside it was 92 by the end of the day. We laid in melting puddles in our underwear under the ceiling fans all afternoon wishing we had blocks of ice underneath us. Nothing got done, it was just. Too. Hot. Rob came home from work at five bringing with him a wonderful new fan for the outside condenser. In five minutes it was fixed. Gotta say, I do appreciate having my own personal handy-man. We ended up going out for dinner before taking Leeloo to her first puppy class to give the house a chance to cool off before we headed to bed after annihilating yet another swarm. I can't believe it's only June.
It makes me worry that I won't be able to follow through with the chores a full-fledgd homestead needs. It also makes me realize why we have so few small farms in Florida. I can't image living down here a hundred years ago with no possible notion of central air or large scale termite solutions.
Things will get done -however sweat-soaked and slowly- and hopefully, money will also slowly get saved, but it's worrisome and disappointing when nothing seem to ever go as planned.